Healing

I've always love listening to Lauryn Hill.  I feel in some connected to her. We are both born on the same day. We both have a daughter named Selah. BTW I didn't copy her, I am not obsessed... (My daughter was born first) ...

I really wish she would come back and say  something to us...The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill  ministered to us in finding out where our misconception of love originated...Since that album and artful realization. I have made peace with my past, healed, gotten hurt again, healed, "went crazy"...got my mind back and now I am here...

Me and Kizzie used to ride to this song... On repeat, She would melodically heal me with the words that fostered acceptance in the fact  that I am  human who is prone to certain life lessons. The life lessons I often labeled as 'mistakes'...

Lauryn sang" As I look at what I've done. The type of life I have lived. How many things I pray the father will forgive"

The she jumped right into it..."One situation involved a young man...he was the ocean and I was the sand..."

It was not our "Anthem"...It was our freedom song...to free to love and be loved to heal and be healed......to learn when to hold on and when to LET GO..

Why do we never want to let go?  I have to take some responsibility in this. Why do I NEVER SEEM TO LET GO? After 15 years my ex can still provoke me to tears..."I used to love him...but now I don't.."  If that is so, why am I still showing evidence that I care. I need to let go of what he said, what he did.....I'll come back to that.

Too often do we neglect to allow ourselves the time it takes to heal after losing in a relationship....We worry about the kids, the finances, the house...who get the dog?!
But, never about ourselves..



I have to come to peace with the fact that EVERYTHING he ever promised to me, It was the judge that granted to me it in the end.. LOL...funny now but not then.

He lost.  I did not. ...."See, I see him sometimes and the look in his eyes ..is one of a man who's lost treasures untold. See...my heart is gone and I took back my soul...and totally gave my CREATOR control!"
I am a child of the Most High God. I was never built to stay broken. I could be broken. But, that is so God could prove that no matter what broke me..he could always and would always put me back together again.